1.) Pursue JESUS first.
~~~I truly believe this. I was transformed and turned my back from the sinful life I used to have before I met my boyfriend, Cody. I focused on God's ministry. I focused on God. I focused on following Jesus and desiring to be Christ-like in every way. I have admitted to God verbally that I would not really care if I get married or not as long as He is always there. Whatever is His Will for me.
2.) Remove the pressure.
~~~I stopped worrying and trying to make a relationship with every guy I meet. I have learned to surrender my lovelife to God and stop the pressure in me. I wanted a relationship that will glorify Him alone. I never had a relationship like that. I started believing and approving to the verse:
2 Corinthians 6:14
"Do not be yoked together with unbelievers. For what do righteousness and wickedness have in common? Or what fellowship can light have with darkness?"
When I started putting a foundation on that verse, I built more friendships with other male Christians. I just stayed a bit farther from unbelievers (or pre-believers as what our pastor said). I examined their relationships with family, friends and churchmates. Also, I stopped forcing myself to get attracted to someone. It's unbearable. While I was reading the last few lines in this 2nd pointer, I was all smiling and nodding. Here are two lines:
"Don’t settle for less than God’s best for you. Remember that, in your search for your future spouse, you can’t find the winner if you’re dating a runner-up."
I just realized that I almost settled for the runner-up but then God led me faithfully to my winner...my Cody!
3.) Build relationships gradually.
~~~Cody and I started with friendship. Real friendship. There was this one time I was having a problem, he was the only person whom I confided to. And to think, we had one major understanding before that. He lovingly stayed with me. He never left me til I felt better. We truly started with friendship without malice. Friendship that naturally grew romantically. It's amazing. We began to share our worlds. Opened up our hearts fearlessly. Shared our dreams carefully.
In the second gear part on page 2 of the article, all my answers were yes. In the third gear, we are moving to the path of marriage. Fourth gear, well, honey, we gotta be engaged! hahaha! jk hahaha! Fifth gear, oh wow I am very much excited to get married with my one-and-only Cody!
4.) Guard your sexual integrity.
~~~True! I am so grateful for a boyfriend who has wise convictions. Sometimes wiser than mine. hahaha! A good, rational brain. He never wants to compromise our sexual life. He is very consistent with this matter. I am so blessed! I have read a book by Joshua Harris entitled "Not even a hint" before I met Cody. But I think it's title has been changed. I'm not sure. It's an amazing book. I recommend it to all of you. My beliefs with sex has been shaken in my past but truly GOD IS FAITHFUL! I wanted to blog earlier about sex in relationships but I was doubtful at first because it's a very sensitive topic but then I read this article and wonderfully it said, "...and writing an inspiring love story to share with others." More to come though. Do not risk your marriage by premarital sex. Sex is sacred. Sex was created by GOD. But it is to be done rightfully at the right time and in the right ways and places too. Lust will destroy the beauty of sex. Learn to wait. Sex is beautiful. Enjoy it at GOD's perfect time and you will never feel guilty or ashamed.
"Nothing won easily is appreciated very long." ~Michelle McKinney Hammond
Thank you, Cody! I know you are my every heart's desire as a future husband. I thank GOD for your wise convictions and your heart for GOD! I am blessed to have you!
5.) Don't play house.
~~~I never believed in living together before marriage. Thank GOD Cody and I will get married before living together. hehehe! Am I right, Cody? hahaha! jk
Marriage isn't a game. It is very serious. God is serious with every command in His Holy Word.
Genesis 2:24
"For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and they will become one flesh."
Marriage and sex. Very clear. Where does sex happen? In the house privately. So marriage first before living together and having sex. It's as simple as that.
6.) Break up when you need to do so.
~~~If you are with an unbeliever, I advise you to break up. But then, I also believe in commitment. A commitment is a covenant offered to God. When you break a covenant, it becomes a curse. Am I scaring you now? hehehe! Well, it's up to your convictions and what God is telling you. Listen attentively with your whole being and wholeheartedly. Do not be afraid to break up because God has a plan in your life. The best plan ever. I was so afraid to break up with the ex but then God made a way and I am so happy that the ex broke up with me because I met my Cody a few months after. The ex is an unbeliever, by the way, who wanted an ungodly relationship. Now I know why God has allowed everything that happened in my past.
7.) Rewrite the story of your life.
~~~Surrender everything to God. Rely on God's Word, God's Will, God's love and God's grace. God is working all things for the good of those who love Him.
8.) Set your priorities wisely.
~~~GOD, family and ministry. Intimacy with God. Your spouse. Your children. Remember that your family is your first ministry (an insight from my mom). Then your ministry outside your home. Know your priorities and set your feet on THE ROCK (JESUS).
9.) Keep passion alive.
~~~There is never a day that my love and passion for Cody do not grow. I love him more each day. I respect him more each day. I admire him more each day. I trust him more each day. My attraction to him grows more each day. I always make it a point to say that I love him so very much even if we have complications. Love grows more that way. Hatred doesn't have an entry point. He never stops pursuing me. He also reassures me every time that he will never get lazy in our relationship. It is true and I can hardly wait for all the experiences to come after marriage.
10.) Deepen intimacy.
~~~Intimacy with God first. Cody and I always try to communicate every feeling or hurt we have. Every problem. Just everything under God's guidance. We are very open and honest with each other and we both make it a point to listen carefully. Intimacy is very significant in relationships.
11.) Embrace your different roles.
~~~I have my own way of reminding Cody about his roles as a man. Now, he is very strong and he consistently tells me that he's the leader. hahaha! Well, honey, you are doing a good job. We're headed on the right track. The man should always lead you to God's Word and to GOD Himself. Women should always be submissive and dependent on GOD. Only submit to godly husbands though. hehehe! Women should never insult or badmouth their men. It is an insecurity for them. Always be a blessing to your husband in every way. Be gracious as God is full of grace.
1 Corinthians 11:7
"A man ought not to cover his head, since he is the image and glory of God; but the woman is the glory of man."
12.) Build healthy habits.
~~~Cody and I believe that every change should start before marriage not during. Why? Practice before marriage makes perfect. You will have the tendency to feel that you are forced to change when you do it during the marriage. You will also have the tendency to get tired and sick after that. Healthy habits such as talking over and resolving conflicts before marriage is very useful because it allows both of you to perfect the love God has given both of you and you will have a wonderful marriage that you will not get sick of. All the emotional baggage and insecurities should be dealt with before marriage so you will never bring it up during marriage. You should desire a happy marriage. Overlook offenses and unintended hurts is very important and forgive easily. Hate pride. It is never good for any kind of relationship.
Proverbs 19:11
"A man's wisdom gives him patience; it is to his glory to overlook an offense."
Grow in GOD together. Cody and I have a habit of reminding each other to pray and read the Bible even though we know that we will both do it. Funny.
Always lead each other to GOD.
13.) Base your marriage in a covenant.
~~~I always tell Cody that I will never leave him because it is a covenant I made to God. Not only that, it's because I love him unconditionally.
How about you? Do you want a Godly marriage? Examine your relationships right now. If you are single and still waiting, don't get tired because God is either preparing you or your future spouse. If you are married, always glorify GOD in your marriage. Fear God above all and He will guide your every step. Surrender everything to Him.
Make an impact. Make a difference. Make a ripple. Tip the scale.
GOD BLESS YOU AND YOUR RELATIONSHIPS!
ALL THE GLORY BELONGS TO GOD ALONE!!!
P.U.S.H.
When you feel GOD's love, OVERFLOW!
What captured my eyes is the clouds. Very beautiful. The clouds look like angels flying swiftly in the sky that you won't be able to see them but traces of their swiftness.
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